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Permaculture

New Year 2010

Hello again to everyone in the blogosphere, welcome to 2010! (sounds like it could be a TV show... you know 90210 kinda?)

After quite a hiatus I have a new year goal to make an entry on my blog at least once per month this year. This actually means two entries as I will also be making an entry on my gardening blog each month .. well, attempting to!

So what's the haps? Here goes:

Children:
Still living at home, one working part time with same employer, other has just finished Bachelor of Contemporary Visual Arts. Eldest may move out this year. 21st birthday for the other one this year.

Things I've Done/Am Doing:
Haven't been doing much Reiki nor meditation, both have made it to my new year goals.

Became one of the EMRCs inaugral Earth Carers and have already volunteered on an info stand. Intend to do more of this during the year and there are some great workshops planned for the Earth Carers. This has been a great thing to do and I recommend if it's available in your area, and you are even a little concerned about our planet then do it! Some of my years goals are related to reducing waste/caring for the planet.

Ride my bicycle to work generally about 3 times a week (weather permitting). I really enjoy it and it gets exercise built into my day. Also saves me money (either fares or fuel & parking) and is kinder to the planet (smaller carbon footprint, uses no/little fossil fuels). When I reach my weight loss target this year I will buy myself a new road bike!

Employment:
Working full time in government - this is from where I will retire, but hope to be working part time before then. Applied for 2 weeks additional leave for this year however it has been rejected for now, to be reconsidered at a later time.

Going through a restructure currently so will be interesting to see where that takes me. Possibility of applying for a promotion; undecided as yet whether to apply - do I want the stress and responsibility that it will bring? Probably not, though the $$ would certainly not go astray.

Finances:
Not in great shape so this also made my new year goals which are to reduce debt and start/continue saving - one holiday, one retreat and one new bike are already on the spending plan, so I need to get going with the saving plan! Also will be looking to replace my car soon-ish, last year I said it would be this year, but looking at the finances I'd say it is more likely to be next year.

Gardening:
Getting back into the vegie patch - planted it out several days ago. I hope to maintain it all year this time, even if it's just growing a green fertiliser crop.

I've put shadecloth over the clothesline (under which is the vegie patch), so hopefully it will make it through the summer - already had a 40 degree day (before planting) and two days time is forecast for 39 degrees, so fingers crossed.

Great new vegie gardening book - One Magic Square.. if you're in Australia and want to grow vegies but no idea how to start then get this book! Written by a South Australian.

Weight Loss:
I managed to only reduce my weight by about 3kg last year, a pretty dismal effort in my opinion. As I don't have a lot of weight to lose it is proving a little difficult. I have set a goal of exercising 4 times per week (includes riding to work) and losing 1kg per month. I'm aiming to weigh 57kg by 30 June, at which point I will go into maintenance mode for a while whilst deciding whether I feel I need to reduce any further.

Self:
Quite happy within myself. Feeling no need for a partner. Main personal goal for the year is to be less slothful (ie get off my lazy arse!), particularly in regards to tidyness/organistaion of the house.

So that's where I'm at, and where I'm hoping to go this year.

Wishing you all a happy, healthy and prosperous year!

Yeah I know it's been a while but I've been busy doin' stuff - one of which is losing and gaining and losing weight :)

Here's how the graph looks now - yup I have passed my first target goal of 62Kg. Mind you I was there three weeks ago as well but then put on weight for no known reason (other than perhaps my body protesting at riding my bike to work again now that the weather has fined up!)

Time to set a new target goal - which is 59Kg, so that's what will show on the graph
next time I post.

So I'm keepin on keeping on, Calorieking.com.au still getting my attention every day with it's easy to use food and exercise diary and helpful folk in the forums.

Started boot camp yesterday, only a little sore today, though I'm sure the trainer will crank things up a bit next week and make me as sore as I *thought* I would be this week!

That's all for now, will tell you about Earth Carers another time, wonderful course I've been doing.

Ciao

And up we go ..

Whilst I didn't expect to keep losing weight at the rate I had been, I hadn't really expected my weight to go back up, but eh, it happens.

I guess it is not surprising as I had increased my calorie intake due to being concerned my body was going into starvation mode.

So I put on 400g from last Sunday. Not disasterous, but need to get the line going back down in the other direction!

Here's the chart .. still looking fairly good!




This Weeks Challenge
This weeks' challenge is that my mum is staying with me whilst she has some surgery and recovers. Unknown yet how long she will be here. It may be a bit of a challenge sticking to the eating plan whilst she's here - we'll have to wait and see how that goes.

Have a great week everyone!

I've had to post date this post as I didn't get to add this info last week, and my internet access is 'shaped' so internet usage is a pain in the beeeehind at the moment.

Anyway, as of Sunday last week I had lost another 700g (ie 0.7 Kg). I was mightly impressed with this, I had expected to drop down to losing half a kilo or less.

I'm sure this trend will cease soon enough, so I better enjoy it whilst I can!

Here's the chart - doesn't it look good!!!!


Minor issue with fibre and some accidental overuse of Nulax on the Friday night preceeding weigh in, but I had a full roast dinner on Saturday night!

Am really liking the CalorieKing website, so easy to use and doesn't matter whether I'm at home or at work I can fill in the food diary and how much water I'm drinking :)

Probably wont post on this Sunday either as I'm off to the Conscious Living Expo and will no doubt be there all day just like the last two years :)

Ciao fer now.

The Downward Slide

Yay me!!

I lost 1.6kg this week - that's the most I have ever lost in a week since I started trying to lose weight!!!!!!!!!!

Woohoo go me!!!

Here's the graph:



Doesn't that look good!!!!

What am I so Happy About?
Well yes, of course I am happy about the weight loss, but even more than that (and perhaps a little more Buddhist) I am very pleased that I have been disciplined this week.

On one day I ate more than my imposed calorie intake of 1200cal. I went to the movies on Tuesday night and decided I was going to have a treat - a 100g bag of chips (Red Rock Deli Chilli. of course - there may as well not be any other type of chips as far as I'm concerned!). This put me over my 1200 mark, but under 1600, so I was still happy with that. Whilst I want to lose weight I still want to live as well :)

I skipped exercise on Tuesday and Thursday. Tuesday cos of going to the movies and Thursday - well just because. Exercised all the other days - 30 minute walk mostly, although on Saturday I found out about C25K (more about that later).

So I'm very pleased with myself for having maintained exercise and allocated calorie intake for most of the week.

Reward
Earlier in the week I thought I was doing fairly well so I set up a reward for myself. I didn't have to go to work on Friday so I made an appointment for a full body scrub. Ahhhh such a wonderful pamper that is!

I like getting these in the cooler months to help slough off all the dead skin, and as a bonus you get a body rub as well (softer than a massage) when they rub the moisturizer into your skin. It was heaven, I really enjoyed it.

Think I'll make my next reward either a manicure or pedicure; I can't afford to splurge on a full body scrub every time!

Tools
To help keep track of how I'm going I have a sheet of graph paper in the bathroom right next to the scales, and have been weighing myself every day. Now I know that's not recommended due to usual daily fluctuations, but what if weigh in day happens to be a heavy day - no reason to feel all dejected if you've been half a kilo lighter all week then only get a 100g weight loss on weigh in day! So I weigh myself every day, but keep it in perspective.

In addition to the graph I have been keeping a food diary in MS Excel and using the CalorieKing website to find out the nutritional values of the foods that I eat.

This has been working really well except that it can be a bit tricky remembering what I've eaten until I can get home and put it on the spreadsheet. I started moving the spreadsheet to and from work/home on a thumb drive, and also tried emailing to myself to the other location, but it was getting too much fiddling for me. Then I discovered more about Calorie King.

Calorie King Website - Weight Loss Tools
I was looking at the site on Friday getting some details to add into my Excel food diary when I noticed the other menu items on the website. I'd never bothered looking at them previously.

Wow, this is an amazing website to assist with weight loss. I joined up (costs NOTHING) and they have an amazing food diary right there, suggested meal plans, recipes, articles on weight loss, exercise and nutrition, forums ... the whole shebang.

This is great - now I don't have to cart my food diary between work and home, I just log on whether I'm at home or at work and there is all my information ready to be added to!

You can add your own custom foods if they don't already exist in their database, and save them so you don't have to type all the info in every time you eat that particular thing. You can also make your own custom meals for things you eat frequently - like the cheese and turkey snack I often have for morning or afternoon tea. I've added it in as a custom meal so now it's just one click to add that in as a 'meal'.

There are tallies for each meal as well as a progressive total for the whole day, plus an area to record how much water you're drinking, and of course a spot to indicate whether you've exercised that day.

At the bottom of each day it indicates how much of your calories you've consumed and gives a net calorie total for the day (ie calories eaten less calories used in exercise).

You can also set what nutritional values you want to see - calories and KJ are standard, but you can add in Protein, Carbs, Carbs, Fat, Fibre, Sodium, Calcium and a bunch more. For each item you choose there is a bar at the bottom for the day showing how much of your allocated amounts you've consumed.

And of course there's an area to check in each week/however often you wish, and record your weight and also your measurements.

Impressed
You can probably tell I'm very impressed with this website. It really does seem to have all the tools one requires to assist with a weight loss plan. There's a US version of Calorie King as well.

So if you're trying to lose (or gain!) weight, go check out Calorie King!

Losing Weight - or Not!

I haven't been very strict on what I've been eating lately so it's no surprise that I haven't been losing weight, and in fact it has been creeping up slowly slowly.

Also not helping is that I have not been motivated to exercise. The treadmill has achieved the sole purpose of dust gathering this week. It does come in handy to hang clothes off that need that extra bit of drying from the heater though!

The only exercise I've done in the last week is the regular Sunday morning walk with my ex.

But enough is enough. I really don't like the size of my thighs not my tummy. And I don't like the number the scales show me when I get on. So it's time to jump back on the bandwagon.

It Starts with Today
So today I am starting anew. I've checked out the eating plan for the week. 1200 calories 45% protein, 30% carbs and 25% fat. I have everything I need in the fridge/pantry.

Instead of purchased frozen meals for two of my lunches I've made a Continental LITE beef and vegetable casserole and split it into four portions in the freezer.

I really quite like these Continental LITE meal bases, I've tried the Country Chicken and Beef Stroganoff and both were quite yummy. As I wasn't particularly watching my food when I made those I ate them with brown steamed rice (I use the ppouches of 90 second rice), which of course put the calorie, and particularly the carb, count over what I should have been eating.

But the beef and vegie caserole already has vegies in it so I don't need to eat anything else with it. 300 calories for a lunch is right on the mark.

So The Food is Sorted, Now for the Exercise ...
This is the hard part. I find it difficult to get motivated to exercise, particularly when I am by myself.

The Sunday morning walks are good as the fact someone else is involved always motivates both of us to actually get up out of bed and go do it.

I bought the treadmill as a replacement for bike riding during winter. I'm not gung-ho enough to ride when it's cold, wet and windy. Some weeks I've been fairly good, doing three nights walking in a week, but often it is just too damn easy to simply lay on the couch and watch the box.

I did wonder for a while though whether that was partly due to a low iron count. Now that I'm taking iron tablets (well, I remember *most* of the time) hopefully I wont be feeling quite so lethargic. We'll see!

Supplements
As mentioned above I'm taking iron tablets on my doctors' advice. He advised it was probably diet induced as there isn't much red meat in this eating plan and I'm not big on spinach.

I'm also taking 1000mg Omega 3 oil and Green Tea extract.

Goal
Yes I'm setting myself what may seem as a fairly easy goal to start with. I'm aiming for 62Kg. That's just a smidge more than 2.5Kg to lose from where I am now.

That may seem far too easy for some ofyou, but my experience earlier in the year is that I do not lose weight easily. Even when doing exercise 6 out of 7 days, both cardio and strength and being fairly strict on what I eat - it took me nearly 4 months to lose 2.5Kg. So let's see what happens this time.

Here is my chart so far ... I will try to post it weekly:

My Weight Chart:

Meditation

I practice meditation fairly regularly - at least once every week, generally more. I'd really like to return to practicing every day however I haven't managed to work it into my 'new' schedule as yet.

There are many types of meditation. I don't know the name of the type I practice but it's of the empty/spacious mind, being present in the now type of meditation.

The place in which I seem to meditate the best is at the Buddhist Society of WA temple in Nollamara. Partly this is because I have set aside the time to be there for the sole purpose of meditation, but there also seems to be something about being in a room with 100+ people all meditating, and maybe the Buddhist monks who conduct the meditation have something to do with it also.

I attended Friday night meditation very regularly last year but have got out of the habit. At the moment the monks and nuns are on Rains Retreat so there are guest speakers conducting the meditation there at the moment. I think I'll try return when Rains Retreat has concluded.

Going to meditation on Friday nights was rather hectic in getting there on time, however always well worth the effort. I found it a wonderfully practical way to signify the end of the working week and the beginning of the weekend.

The main road to/from meditation is a 70kph zone. I would usually be doing just over the speed limit on my way there, however I always found it difficult to get up to that speed on my way home after meditating! A sure sign that meditation had resulted in a slowing of my pace.

Life Intrudes
I find it much more difficult to calm/clear my mind when I'm at home. Primarily I think that's because there are so many other things I should or could be doing other than sitting doing 'nothing'.

If I go to another place (like the temple) to meditate that's the only thing I'm meant to be doing - meditating - and so there are less thoughts in my head to distract me.

Stretching Time
One thing that rather amazes me about meditating is how it seems to stretch time.

In normal waking life time only ever seems to go slowly when you're doing something you really don't want to do, or are somewhere you really don't want to be.

At home or at work 10 minutes just flies past. But when I'm meditating time slows right down and seems to last so much longer.

I open my eyes to peek at the clock thinking the timer must be just about to go, and it's only been 5 minutes since I closed my eyes!

What a shame I haven't yet worked out how to transfer this time stretching over into other activities - it only seems to work when I'm meditating, oh well, something to aim for :)

They Way I Do the Things I Do...
Generally I just try to clear my mind and concentrate on the sensation of my breath in doing so. If I find myself thinking I bring my attention back to my breath. Sometimes I count the breaths if I'm particularly distracted.

In Buddhism for Busy People David Michie (sp?) advised if counting breath to 10 is too much then just try for 4. He apparently spent quite some years doing only that much - 10 minutes sessions counting 4 breaths, and often not even getting to 4.

I was very heartened to hear this - I often can't get to 4 either!

But with meditation, as with a number of other things, it's not the quality of the meditation - it's the fact that I bother to try that is important.

More, some other time...

Work

One of the things that has been distracting me for some time is work.

At the beginning of November last year I returned to work from two weeks holiday only to be told that I was being laid off due to the economic downturn.

It was rather a shock, and I'm probably one of the first 'victims' in Perth of the GFC. I had just used up almost all of my holidays and we were only just over a month from Christmas - not a great time to lose your job (not that there's often a GOOD time to lose your job!)

Thankfully I had already been applying for other jobs however none had come to fruition and as they were government jobs I was going for, the selection processes were very long and drawn out.

On my last day at my old job I was advised I'd been sucessfull in being placed in a 'pool', and there was a big chance that I would be offered a position with that department very soon.

Then came the governments' 3% efficiency dividend ... I rang every week but still there was no position for me.

Temp'ing
So I contacted a temping agency and did 6 weeks temp work over Christmas. They pay was lower than I had been getting, it was only a month-by-month thing and of course there was no sick leave.

No problem, I don't usually get ill very often at all. But I came of my bike on New Years Day and had to have two days off work due to injury (and would have taken longer if I'd had paid sick leave - my leg was a mess, and is still not back to normal now!)

Temping wasn't too bad, I'm glad I had the experience - and now this is what my daughter wants to do when she finishes uni at the end of this year!

I worked at the Office of Enery and they were a great bunch of people. I didn't get paid for public holidays so of course worked all through the traditional Christmas break. But for those stalwarts who were at the office we made a roast turkey lunch on Christmas eve :) Learnt things from these folks that was helpful for me in regards to my solar power experiment (see previous post).

But no security was not good for me - security is one of the biggies for me.

Slightly More Security ...
Then at the end of January I had a phone call to say there was an 11 month contract position available from hte pool - I took it, 11 months was far better than temping month by month, and it was a higher level, so more pay. Plus I would be doing the same work as if I had a permanent job from the pool, and would slide over seamlessly when a permanent position became available.

Then Finally ...
I only had to wait about 6 weeks for a permanent position to become available, so now I'm a permanent employee in state government public service.

I'm slowly recovering my financial situation and should have that all under control by the end of this year.

Then I'll be past the 'just paying the bills' stage and be able to plan some more fun things!

Time for dinner,

Ciao fer now.

Power to the People!

One of the things I've been researching, thinking about and planning is to have a solar photo-voltaic system installed at my house.

I've had a very small system on top of my shed (installed by my prior partner) for quite a few years. It powers a couple of garden lights. Well, actually only one still works.

I love the idea of generating my own power, and from since before the garden light system was in, have thought how great it would be to generate my own power for the house.

Thanks to technology, generous government grants to encourage folk, and some long awaited funds I now have my own solar pv system on the roof of my outbuildings:


There are 6 panels and they take up a surprisingly small amount of space:

You can see from the above I could easily fit another two sets of 6 panels at least on that roof. The garden light system panel is sitting on the shed roof just above the far right corner of the new panels (small dark rectangle on the white roof).

This is a 1.0 Kilowatt system and it's expected to generate up to one quarter of my power requirements going on my usual usage. It is shortly going to be connected to the city's power grid and then, if my house isn't using all the power the system is generating, the extra power will be fed back into the grid. The power company will pay me for this electricity - basically at the same rate as they charge me.

There's an inverter that changes the current/voltage from 12v to 240v so that the power can be used by the house/fed back into the grid. The inverter has a readout that shows how much power the system has generated since being installed.


At the moment it's stating it has generated 60Kwh (kilowatt hours) since it was installed 1 month ago. My average usage in winter over the last 5 years is about 14 units per day - so in one month I've generated enough power for just over 4 days. My most recent power bill which includes three weeks of the system being operations states on average of only 12 units per day. Not very impressive when it comes down to it.

However it is the middle of winter and the inverter panel frequently indicates the system is generating only about 25% of it's total capacity. Whilst the system isn't located in an optimum location (it was the best of the available options) I'm expecting much better performance in summer.

Considering the price of electricity has increased twice in the last four months by more than 25% at least I should be sheltered somewhat from the price increases by my lower usage of power.

But the real reason for doing this is not the money. Initial cost of the system was substantial even with the government grant, and I would not have been able to afford it other than I had some funds coming to me. And the money the power company pays me for the power I feed back into the grid is never going to be substantial. Even if they introduce the Feed In Tarriff they have been talking about that only continues until the installation costs of the system have been recouped.

No, the real reason for doing this is I just LOVE the idea of generating my own power. I don't know whether it's an independence/self-sustainability thing, or a be-kind-to-the-planet thing, but it just makes me feel really good inside :)

The "I'll Just Pretend I Don't Know I Haven't Posted for Ages" Post

Strangest thing - I'm trying to lose weight. Many of the people who've made my acquaintance in the past would scoff at this idea; I did not used to be the type of person who ever had to even think about losing weight.

It's the dreaded non-smoking that did it (of course - oh yes, that's sarcasm). Whilst not smoking would have surely slowed my metabolism I'm sure it is not the only reason for me being about 13kg heavier than when I stopped smoking.

So now that I am a confirmed non-smoker (confirmed non-smoker = more than 12 months since I stopped) it is time to do something about the spare tyre around my middle, and the love handles (don't really see the point in them since no one's there to hold onto the handles!), and the thighs that don't fit into standard shaped trousers. Mind you I do quite like the fat that is filling my bra at the moment - haven't had a rack like this since I was pregnant/breast feeding! (Yes, yes, I do realise it will be the first thing to go when I lose weight - sigh)


I have been making a valiant effort to lose weight, but so far the results have been less than spectacular.

Eli Stone is on TV now so the rest will have to wait 'til another evening.

Ciao

Still Alive

An overseas friend enquired today whether I was still alive as I had stopped posting on my blog some time ago and there had been some question as to whether I had a serious health issue ..


So I'm here to say I am still alive although not very visible in the cyberworld these days.

Made this in the last two weeks for my daughter - she had a fancy dress 21st party to go to and had been given the letter 'V', so chose to be a vampire. The vampire dress goes well with the black cloak I had made for her previously.

Enjoy the pics. May write more later.

Work/Life

I am having a lot of challenges at the moment with my work/life balance - I don't have the balance right.

I was thinking this through the other day and my new favourite saying at the moment (other than within my boss's hearing distance) is that we have this all arse about...

Work should fit in around our life.

Life shouldn't have to fit in around our work.

And Now Here is The News

Today it is two months since I smoked an entire cigarette.

Today an ANZAC Day service was held in France for the first time ever, at Villers Bretenneux - where my Great Grandfather John David Plummer died in WWI

Dreams

I've had some dreams recently that I wish to record ...

Most of the dreams I'm remembering are dreamt between the time when I first wake (often around 5 or 6 am) and the time I get up.

Responsibilty
I change jobs in the middle of the day, and am settling in at my new desk.

My mother appears at the side of my desk with my dog (deceased in real life) on a leash and some weird wax construction around his mouth with a hole at the end so he can still eat, breath, pant etc. She admonishes me for having forgotten to pick him up from doggy day care. Much discussion about the was thing around his mouth.

I think this dream was about responsibility.

Rats
I thought (in the dream) there was a rat in my kitchen. I anxiously/dreadingly kneeled down and looked under the fridge expecting to see a pair of eyes looking back at me, however there are two dead rats under the fridge. Both have been dead for some time as there is a dark patch on their bellies and a pool of (what I assume is) body fluids under and around each rat. There is also a mouse caught in a trap. I dispose of the dead mouse body.

Not sure what this is about. Rats to me indicate something gnawing away, something unpleasant. Dream dictionary indicates perhaps jealousy (amongst other things). So perhaps the fact these rats are dead means these things are over for me now.

Dream dictionary indicates catching a mouse in a trap signifies something good in regards to finances.
(It was just a day or so before this dream that I contacted my lawyers asking for the rest of my money in their trust account be sent back to me)

Kiwi Guy
This morning I dreamt about Kiwi Guy, for the first time. (Sigh, and I thought I had been making progress in that regard- having recently banished him) Started off there was a neighbourhood BBQ like they've been advertising on the radio/TV - lots of cops around cooking the BBQs but it was in the street of hmm Northbridge I think. I asked someone if they knew where there was a second hand bookshop.

Somehow I loose my wallet/handbag. Whilst there are many cops around I don't approach any of them about it.

Next I'm at a childs' birthday party where there are a lot of (ie mostly) adults in attendance . Kiwi Guy is there & I tell him about my purse being stolen. He grabs the phone from a teenager and makes them get off the phone so I can report my stolen wallet. Next thing I remember I'm having sex with Kiwi Guy and thinking of asking him to move in with me. Somehow we are outside (think the sex started off in the back of a ute), not quite on the lawn of the house where the childs party is being held. The adults start to come out of the house (they're leaving) we are partly covered by a sheet. Someone comments on the (generous) size of Kiwi Guys appendage.

Wore the batteries out a fair bit when I woke up from that one; one was not enough.

What Do You Mean, It Can't Be February Already!?

Sheeesh it's already February!?!? How did that happen?

Revelation
I had a bit of a revelation this week.

It's to do with the being-authentic-to-myself theme that has been playing within me for quite some time now.

I keep thinking that I want to be more intuitive, and to live more from my heart than in/from my head. I set this up as the underlying theme of the last kinesiology session I had.

You know what? There is it right there in front of me - I *am* a head person. That is the truth of me, and here I am keeping on wanting it to be different. In hanging onto that wanting to be different I am trying to not be who I am.

I am a head person, not a heart person.

(Doesn't mean I don't have a heart mind you!)

Metaphysical
In the second half of last year I became drawn to metaphysical matters. I undertook Reiki I training and have received a couple of kinesiology sessions. I read some books about crystals, chakras, The Journey, Way of the Peaceful Warrior, The Diamond in Your Pocket. I went to the Conscious Living Expo in November and had my aura and chakra's photographed and interpreted.

I find this an interesting path, and wonder at times whether this is a path I should follow a little further by undertaking some training. It feels as though it would be a very pleasant thing for this to become my profession. however I fear that it may be a passing fad/phase for me, and therefore am hesitant to invest (what feels like) a lot of funds in this direction.

I am attending a Gong Concert in March, and hope to attend a session regarding Tibetan Singing Bowls.

This Year
I will do my Reiki II training.
I will seek and gain more balanced, less stressful employment.
I will stop poisoning myself with cigarettes.
I will exercise/ride my bike almost every week.
I will control my finances.
I will undertake some other course/s. Undecided whether the head or the heart will decide which.
I will become more at peace with myself.

Merry Christmas to All

Yes I'm still here, and now that I'm on holidays for just over a week I may actually write something in here other than ...


Merry Christmas to all in Blogland!

Another Dream

I had this dream last Thursday night - the night I had given Reiki to KiwiGuy. Whether that fact had anything to do with the content of the dream I guess I'll never know, but I can't dismiss it as a possibility.


Dream....

I was of an indeteriminate age - younger than I am no, but not a teenager. I was laying on my bed not quite the bed I have now, but not one I have ever had) examining two of my vibrators (ones that I currently own), trying to decide which one was best. I was moving my hand over them feeling their shape and looking at them quite closely. Mr Purple had some dried residue on it which I scratch off with my fingernail. My mum and dad were not far away, just down the hall and would occasionally come into view. I was quite at ease with the fact they might see me and what I was doing.

I think I may have actually used one or both of the vibrators, not with the purpose of having an orgasm, but to investigate them more. Their shape and feel and which one one I liked best.

The dream finished with my decision unmade - I hadn't decided which was better, which one I liked more.


Interpretation.
Only as I have written the above has it come to realisation what this might be about. Whilst I have recalled the dream a couple of times since I experienced it I haven't been trying to work out what it meant.

In writing it down .. particularly the words 'which one I liked more' .. it occurred to me that maybe it was about deciding whether I liked being in a relationship more than being on my own. Mr Purple represents being on my own. The other vibrator represents being in a relationship because it is penis shaped (Mr Purple is not).

Hmm so does scraping off dried residue from Mr Purple represent anything I wonder. And what of the presence of my parents and it not being of importance whether they could see what I was doing.

I didn't come to a decision in my dream (darn it!). I wonder if I will now come to a decision consciously.

And now I"m pretty certain that having interacted with KiwiGuy that night probably DID have something to do with me having that dream.

Interesting.

Psychic and Healing Fair

I went to the Psychic and Healing Fair on the weekend. I was interested to go for a couple of reasons - 1. to investigate other Reiki teachers 2. Interest in my aura - aura photographs 3. Perhaps have a reading of some sort done.

The aura photo's turned out to be what I had read about and been told about - they hook up your hand and basically project the aura of your hand onto a photo of you .... ie it is *only* the aura of your hand that you see in the photo. And everything I have read about auras would indicate that your aura is different in different parts of your body. So I didn't have a photo done - disappointing.


I had my aura read by a person however. Interesting. Yellow around my head, said I am 'in my head' a lot (very true, something I am aware of and am trying to change). I am a healer, can heal with my hands (green lavender and orange around my hands), I will use crystals, laying them on parts of the body (have never been moved towards crystals and have never heard of them being used in that way), and I will use reflexology (something I have started to become interested in slightly). I need to find my inner peace. I have lots of 'stuff' in my root chakra (no surprise there) that I need to resolve/clear. I should be eating lots of fresh fruit and vege's (had gone on a fruit and vege rampage in the grocery store the day before), and should drink fresh juices (had also bought juicing carrots and celery for juicing the day before). Said I should have someone dig a plot for me (my first reaction was interest in that I needed to have someone *else* dig the plot for me) so I could grow my own fruit and veg, so I would know exactly what chemicals, if any, had been used on them. (Had nearly gone to the nursery the day before to buy vege seedlings).

I am an Earth Mother, need to have my feet in the dirt, down in the dirt with the soil between my toes.

In regards to my health it was confirmed what I have been thinking; a serious illness. But said I am a survivor, that I will survive it. Will need to take the traditional medical route in regards to it, but will survive. Alternative therapy also - I said I'd been giving myself Reiki but she said I needed to be given it by others - needed more energy than just my own.