Saturday was a total waste other than doing the grocery shopping. Could have/should have done lots of things, but didn't, and the tradesman that was coming to quote on ceiling repairs didn't show nor phone. It is SOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooo impossible trying to get my house repaired when working full time :( Got to the end of the day and had done nothing .. again :(
Saturday evening went to dinner with close friends, nothing flash, somewhere nearby that I hadn't tried yet. Food was good and they wouldn't let me pay! I would say 'I'm lucky' to have such good friends, but I know that luck has nothing to do with it. Came back home for coffee after and watched most of Gladiator on SBS.
Sunday morning woke up foggy - only had one bourbon and one port Saturday night, what a two pot screamer I've become :( Not like the times the two of us would go through a bottle of bourbon in a night and not be particularly drunk ...maybe that's a good thing, but I really see it as a reflection of what an anti-socialiser I've become :(:(
Sunday was productive. Finally used the sander that I bought about 2 months ago - have got the BBQ trolley half in bits and sanded the bits I've managed to pull off, but I need help to get the rest apart :( yet another reminder that I don't have a partner, he used to like woodwork too (well, he did for a short while - like most things, lost interest pretty quickly). Have booked myself in for a Bunning Ladies DIY Night - maybe I really don't need to go.
Not much gardening done as I'm waiting for the garden design to come back - don't know how I'll last two weeks with no gardening though :( Replenished the now-defunct bulb bowl by planting it with some herb/salad seeds, and prepared the defunct bulbs for storage. Mowed the final strip of the verge that I (and the bin) couldn't manage last weekend.
Self
Having a project to work on (eg BBQ trolley) is a good thing, I felt pleased at the progress made. But then it's still just something to pass the time, not something I do for me or for the inate pleasure of doing it. Good for my self esteem I guess, fictional deities know I still need every positive stroke I can get on that score. And at least it took my mind of you know who for a few hours.
Those thoughts are still ever-present, when I wake, when I shower, when I make coffee or a meal, when I drive, go shopping... anything and everything. How is he, what's he doing, how's business, how much water under the bridge, how is the 'ride' treating him .... aaarrrggghhhh.
Felt like an extra leg at dinner .. dinner for three is weird, maybe a round table would have been better. Three at a table for four looks like someone didn't come. Or maybe the restaurant should just set the table differently when they know it's going to be three for dinner (which they did, having made a booking).
Thunderbolt did his first Learners test, missed out by one question. It reminded me that he will soon be off and about and here less often, I'm not looking forward to that (not because I don't want him to do it or am overly fearful for him, it's just another reminder that my main reason for being will be leaving soon ....a hurdle I'm most definately *not* looking forward to).
And so another week presents itself to be survived, gotten through, time to be passed, doing for the sake of doing, living but not living.
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