On Adagio

It would seem adagio has had its effect. Whether this was intentional, by it's instigator, is uncertain. I'm not even certain that he understood the effect it would have, but it's consequences/results have been noticed after only a week.

Adagio slows things down, removes the heat from a situation; there is a lack of fuel, and without more fuel the heat dissapates and fades; excitement fades. Was it heated? To me the temperature was high. We were playing with fire, or maybe just a spark that wanted to become a fire. The spark now lays unattended and is burning itself out.

Adagio is pedestrian, safe, unexciting; you don't get carried away when in adagio.

The return of the 'chasm' feeling of the weekend is perhaps an indicator that the spark has gone.

Do I like it?
No.

Why don't I like it? Is it because of the lack of excitement? Is it because I miss feeling the spark?

The spark has been felt only a few times this week. But it seems that adagio snuffed it out again each time.

Do I want to play with the spark again? I don't know. It's fun, it's exciting, it's exhilarating; but I know it's dangerous.

Do I do as I have done in the past and take the safe route, or is it time to live a little? Maybe I've lived as much as I'm supposed to and now it's time to rest again.

Is it Good or is it Bad?
Things are different, for certain. I am different - back to being quiet, back to my small little life, back to being uninteresting. I fear what the consequence of that might be - a result I do not want.

But the fire is dangerous. Is it too dangerous? Too dangerous to play with? Does the fact that I know it's dangerous mean I will pay due care and attention and be able to play without getting burnt? Are there asbestos suits available? Is the support team on hand to deal with any burns?

I don't know.

Purpose of Adagio
If his stated aim is to be achieved then I think we need to stay in adagio or wait for its' full effect to be felt. Maybe that has already happened.

If we move out of adagio now it's possible things will return to how they were - I'm not certain that the spark is dead quite yet.

In a way I want that, but it caused angst for both parties.

Ah me, ah my.